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choices, Don Koen, Handicapped, Handicapped Fishing, Inspiring Stories, Island Traveler Weekly Image of Life Inspiration, Overcoming Life's Obstacles, positive attitude, When the World Outside my window goes insane
When I was young, the clock radio nudged me from slumber each morning. A Memphis, Tennessee station usually played the top 20 countdown, which trumped my other choice of a raucous alarm to start each day. I will never forget once when the radio clicked into the wake-up mode, but instead of music, I was blasted with a loud greeting from the DJ, “GET OUT OF THAT BED! Think of how many people would like to get out of bed and can’t!”
Poof! That worked for me, and I have carried that nugget of advice with me and kept it close to my heart. Whenever I ponder snoozing for half an hour more, I remember that moment and am suddenly prepped to embrace my day.
Other eventful moments have influenced my attitudes about life; long ago during a busy day with endless phone calls, I asked my father if he’d like for me to snip the phone line. He replied, ”Imagine how empty your life would be if no one called or came by.” Whenever my life seems too crowded, I try to respect that advice and remember to be grateful for the many people who love and support me.
My nephew, Don Koen, made an equally-sobering remark once, when he asked, “Aunt Lisa, who taught you how to be so positive?”
I was visiting Don in his home in Little Rock, Arkansas as we waited on a kettle of soup to warm. I shrugged and replied, “No one. It’s not a choice. I wake up happy almost every day of my life.”
Very slowly he shook his head,“I disagree with you. We make choices every day of our life.”
I looked at my handsome nephew as he stirred the stew from the vantage point of his wheel chair. A moment of clarity washed through me, and I replied, “You are right. Look at you. You were not expecting me to have lunch with you, and you picked me up, drove me to your house, and look – your kitchen is spotless! You could have said, ‘Oh, poor me, excuse the mess. No one has been here to help wash the dishes all week.’”
The day that Don broke his back is forever branded in my memory. The year had been horrid, first his wife miscarried twins, then an ice storm swept through the Deep South and left a swath of hurricane-like damage. Don’s father had a scare with chest pains and spent the weekend in the hospital. A dear friend of mine died in a boating accident. My father died suddenly. About a month later my son was attacked by a dog while running cross country. I remember saying to my neighbor when we returned from the doctor, “I don’t think I can handle much more.” I was numb; emotionally depleted from so much sadness, so much stress piled into a six-month period.
My oldest sister called that Sunday morning in August 1994 with the news of Don’s freak accident. A runaway boat trailer from hell had knocked Don to the ground in the pre-dawn hours and pulled him backwards. Don recently recalled that moment, “When the trailer jumped the curb, I was tossed into the air and landed on the fender and ground.” Don’s back had literally snapped. The early-morning newspaper delivery man called for help, and Don was airlifted to the nearby hospital. With superwoman-like strength, I hurled off all of the old emotional baggage and focused on my nephew as we hurriedly packed and dashed to Little Rock.
Almost twenty years later, I still marvel. From the flames and ashes, Don rode that phoenix and soared into a life of proactive rehabilitation. One miracle son (Trey) and one divorce later, with determination he carved a positive life for himself.
Juggling from wheelchair to driving a vehicle, he gets in and out faster than I can! He fishes on weekends – or kayaks or rides his four-wheeler! He flies from one side of the USA to the other with his work. The word handicapped is not in his vocabulary, and he inspires anyone with his bright spirits, humble nature and amazing wisdom.
An amazing woman came into his life and quickly captured our hearts. Dana was surely sent by the angels, and we cherish her amazing spirit. Karen, Don and Dana visited me in Costa Rica, where Don and Dana chose to spend their honeymoon! While tarpon fishing, zip lining, volcano treks and beach adventures, Don (and Dana) captured everyone’s respect.

“I don’t guess I ever told you that I am afraid of heights.” (Don said this to Karen before zipping into the wild green yonder of the treetops!)
Dana won my heart many times, though she really claimed it on her first fishing trip at Rio Colorado Lodge. After a morning of jumping tarpon had exhausted all of us, she asked as we sat around after lunch, “Why aren’t we fishing?” We exchanged amused glances, jumped into action and returned for an afternoon session of boating tarpon!
Don continues to inspire me every day of my life. No matter what disappointments and challenges affect me – a muddy trek in the pouring rain in the night with no flashlight… Tests for Multiple Sclerosis/ Brain tumor/Aneurysm… Having a tumor removed from my neck… Losing my vision for 24 hours (aspartame warning to everyone!)… Allergic reaction to a scorpion sting… Weary of walking the five kilometers to town… Replacing termite-damaged panels on the house or stringing a barbed-wire fence or pulling a boat through a low-tide muck… Whenever I feel overwhelmed, all I have to do is think of Don, and my problems vaporize! I remind myself that I could be facing those challenges through the vantage point of a wheelchair. I think of him, of his smile and the way he embraces life, and suddenly I am inspired! I choose to squeeze the marrow from each day because I can, and any thing less negates his example.
I instantly embrace those challenges and send up a quiet, “Thanks,” for my life. I also remember to tell my dear nephew that he inspires me every day of my life.
And yes, I still remember to “Get out of that bed” the moment I awaken, in honor of my hero.
Thank you, Island Traveler, for giving me the perfect opportunity to share Don’s story with the world. For more stories of inspiration, visit This Man’s Journey.
Yes, my dear nephew, as Kathy Mattea’s song points out, “When the storms of life just won’t let up, you’re like a change of weather. When dust settles on my dreams, you wash them clean.”
You’re here to remind me- and countless others – that a few good things remain.
I love you,
Lees
(Thanks Don, Dana and Karen for contributing the great photos on short notice!)




















I am out of words. Don’s story is a rare gift of inspiration. His bright, optimistic, happy spirit never gave up when trials came his way. His love for life and family made him overcome all the odds and now lives a life that most of us dreams about. He has a loving wife and a bright son. He has family and friends that stood with him for better or worst. Every image in this post is an inspiration and every words you written shared so much. You my friend is an inspiration as well and it’s a joy to know you through you posts. Have a blessed weekend.
Thanks, my friend; Don’s story and attitude about Life helps all of us embrace our disappointments. We are reminded of how lucky we are, and our problems don’t seem so overwhelming.
Thanks, also, for the perfect theme to present his story. It’s been incubating for years, and I am honored to share through your challenge.
Z.
When I read story like Don’s I said to myself, ” There’s always hope. There’s always something better if we try our best to change and overcome the odds.” Thanks.
You are an amazing person yourself! Yes, it’s our duty to overcome the odds and squeeze the marrow out of our days! z
Thank you for such a beautiful and inspirational post!
You are so welcome. He is a beautiful person and seems totally humbled for my praise. Z
I totally agree with ” island traveler” . Beautiful post on inspiration .
Muchas grrrracias! Don,for some reason, does not feel worthy of my praise. Your positive feedback illustrates that it’s not just about “Aunt Lisa”and family pride!
This post glows with love. What a great first read of the day. Thank you. You are blessed to have great people and reminders in your life.
Thanks you, Lesley! I’m glad that you enjoyed this first read for the day Yes, I am blessed! Z
Beautiful blog! One of the best I have read. What a remarkable young man. I worked with so-called handicapped students for years as our university was designed to be accessible and we had many such students. They were so courageous and undaunted — a constant reminder of how lucky we all are. Many thanks, Z.
Thanks, Hugh. Your feedback is always special, and yes, he is a remarkable young man.
Here is HIS feedback this morning: ” It was Baptist Hospital. I am not worthy of your words. Glad I am working from home today.
Dana and I are off at noon to kayak the Current river in MO.
It is easy to see the love you put into everything you do. (I always tease Dana about love being the secret ingredient in her cooking.)”
Don’s sister, Karen, btw, absolutely glows on the tennis courts. She is beautiful to watch, and when she ‘goofs,’she usually shrugs and flashes that Colgate smile! A pharmacist, she too has remarkable presence! Z
I can’t even begin to explain what I’m thinking. Can’t even begin…
I totally understand. May his life touch yours and help you through those low moments! Z
Thank you for sharing Don’s amazing inspirational story. !
I am sure that one day, he, Dana and Karen will find their way here! We have some scouting and prepping to do to be sure he has the best trip possible! They will love meeting the two of you!
Thanks so much!
Z
I need to bookmark this and read every time I feel a little self-pity. What an inspirational story. I can see how his and Dana’s spirit just radiate…spreading sunshine thoughts. What we reflect on the outside is what what we are within and you, Lisa also radiate it. Thanks for sharing this beautiful journey of one special man. ( I love the title…when the world outside my window goes insane.) Blessings, Lynne
Thank you, my dear friend! You and Ron are so great with your positive feedback and support. One of these days we are going to cross paths! Z
Z, I sincerely hope so.
we’ll have to make that happen one day! z
Sheesh…that is one amazing man. I bet he was pretty awesome before the accident but I imagine a lot of others noticed it after. I particularly like (and agree) the part about having a positive attitude is a choice and that we make many other choices every day. He is in an inspiration much like you! Keep up the great work in all you do and tell your nephew that he helped make my day better as well.
I passed your words on to Don this morning; He and Dana were leaving around noon for a kayak trip! He truly is an amazing and positive person. He’s funny as well! Thanks so much for your comment, and good luck with your marathon training! Z
oh, Lisa, I so much enjoyed this post. my favorite of all yours. I too remember that horrible phone call from Pat when the accident happened and I immediately remembered when we were riding horses and she made Donnie, who was terrified of Trampass but Pat made him ride him to “get over it”, jump a log in the woods in Hamp’s pasture. He jumped it fine, and then, trotted off to Charlie Boy’s leaving us behind with Pat giggling, knowing he was tired of her “get over it” instructions. I so much enjoyed seeing the pictures of Don and Karen to see how they have grown into two beautiful adults! Karen looks like Kate’s identical twin when Kate was that age! I thought at first it was Kate! Wow. what a story. Very inspiring. I went through all the horrible times of remembering what all went on at that time as well; my “second Daddy” Charlie Boy had died around that time. What a walk back in our lives….but what a great ending. I am so happy for Don that he has Dana…she seems like a great person. Thank you so much for sharing this story and for all the wonderful photos!
Hey amiga! Thanks so much for your feedback. You are right about Dana; she is a very special perpetually-happy soul. They left this afternoon for a kayak trip in Missouri!!! Daddy would have loved her! Hopefully one of these days you’ll get to meet Dana, and spend some time with Don and Karen as well! If you’re ever going to Little Rock, you’ll have to let them know! Z
In the 18 years since his accident, I have never heard him complain or even once say ‘Why Me”. He quietly leads by example, and makes the most of every day. He’s the best brother anyone could ever ask for. Don and Dad are currently building a deck onto my house. It looks amazing and like professional work. Just another one of his amazing talents!
It’s always so great to see how the two of you cherish each other, and how the three of you offer such rich support to one another. No, he’s not one to complain is he? He finds a way to reach down and find something amusing to say if there’s a tense moment.
Thanks, KK, for adding your perspective to this post!
Z
Don’s smile says about his never-gave-up spirit. Thank you so much for sharing the amazing story and great photos!
Thanks, Amy. I am glad that you enjoyed his story.
Z
I do think God works in mysterious ways. I never knew don walking. But i have heard many (wild) tales!!
he really has no idea how much of an inspiration he is. I lived a lifetime before I met him. But I never really lived until I met him. Can’t is not in his vocabulary. ( i really don’t think any one in the family understands that word. )
Don challenges me everyday. Do my best, give my all, don’t put anything off. Live life to the fullest.
If you didn’t know him, Lisa’s words have painted his portrait well. We love you and thank you for your wonderful tale.
Dear sweet Dana! Your comment adds so much to this post! Thank you so much for sharing a small slice of your positive feedback. We are all so very lucky to have you in our lives! Thanks, dear sweet beautiful woman! Z
” Can’t is not in his vocabulary. I don’t think anyone in the family understands that word.”
Dana! I don’t think any of us have ever pondered that, but I think you are right! There is a fine line between being hard headed and being completely optimistic!
This is such and uplifting and positive post. The story about Don is an inspiration for everyone else who search for happiness in life. Despite the sad circumstances, Don seem to live a fuller life than most of us do. Yes, it’s all about what we chose on life – and how we chose to approach it – as you yourself is such a good example of. Beautiful post – and thanks for sharing.
You are so right; Don lives a very full life! He and Dana are kayaking in Missouri this weekend! Z
Lisa, what a wonderful story and what an inspiration your nephew is! I admire people like Don, who find a way to deal with the obstacles in their life, whatever the circumstances. The world need people like Don, rolemodels who can show others what is possible as long as you’ve the right attitude. I want to hear more about him
. // Marianne
Thank you so much! He and Dana are kayaking in Missouri, but I forwarded your comment to them. I am sure they are connected via phone, and they will treasure your feedback Thanks! Z
What an amazing story…What a privilege to know someone like Don….It looks like the smils and being positive is in the family!!!
Thank you so much! Yes, he is an amazing person, and yes, we do seem to see our cups more full than empty – sometimes the cup overfloweth! Z
I’ve been saving this post for the weekend because it looked like one I would want to savor – and I was right. Not only are the facts of the story amazing, the implications for the rest of us are unavoidable.
We do make choices, every day of our lives. There’s a lot of whining going on these days about how little we can control, but we have the power to control far more than we often realize: to be positive or negative, to participate or to withdraw, to say “I can’t”, or to ask, “How can I?”
It’s a fact that spirits can be crippled as well as bodies, and negative, sullen and pessimistic people are far more handicapped in life than Don ever will be.
Thanks for sharing his story and the story of those who’ve supported him. And oh – by the way – that’s some fish!
My dear friend.
I look forward to the day when I can give you a huge hug in person! We will be like old friends reunited! When I am in the states, I will try to find a way for my path to swing through your area!
You are such a gift. I will forward this to Don, who is on a kayak trip. For sure, his eyes will fill with tears – he is a sensitive soul- but he will be deeply moved by your words.
Thank you for being the special person that you are!
Z
I can’t say much more than everyone else has already. It was wonderful to sit here this morning with my coffee, read this, and give thanks to the Universe for my health. Your post is a reminder that most of us have little to complain about. We need to GET OUTTA BED and seize the day! Wonderfully inspiring post!
Thank you so much! Your comment brought tears to my eyes, and I am sure that Don will be touched as well. As with the other recent comments, I will forward this to Don and Dana who are kayaking this weekend!
Si, GET OUTTA THAT BED and seize the day! He certainly does that well!
Z
You did a beautiful job of telling the inspirational story of an amazing young man. Billy, Michelle, and I read and enjoyed your blog. We have loved Don(ny)
since we met him as a two year old, and never cease to be amazed or impressed at how he has handled the tragedy that happened to him. I remember visiting him in the hospital on Monday the day after the accident, and he greeted me with a big smile while I could hardly smile back through the tears. He has continued to smile and inspire us every day since. Thank you for sharing his story.
Dear DEAR Mary Jo!
Thank you so much for your comment. Of course you and Billy and Michelle are always at the front when it comes to your loving support and friendship with the Koen family! I am honored to have known you, to have experienced great times and great laughs because of you.
Yes, Don(ny!) is an amazing person.. I will never forget when I asked him, ‘Are we the only people who still call you Donny?’ It was in the Little Rock hospital after the accident, and I heard so many of his friends calling him, “Don.”
To us, he will always be our dear beloved Donny!
Give my love to Billy and Michelle!
Lisa
Love this post. My aunt broke her neck in 2001 and is paralyzed from the neck down. Thank you so much for sharing your nephew’s story!
Hugs,
Kathy
wow; i hope that your aunt has lots of positive people who give emotional support. i’d love to hear her story.
muchas gracais, and i hope that this next week smiles on you!
z
Just came across this post! Such an inspirational and touching read ! stories like this make us realise that our trivial everyday worries are just that-trivial! Life has so much more to offer and its upto us what we make of it!
thank you, amiga. he is an amazing person, and yes, we learn to embrace those silly everyday complaints!
thanks! z
An incredible post
thank you.. he’s an incredible person… z
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Don is truly an inspiration, as are you! Thanks for sharing this amazing story!
You’re right. I thoroughly enjoyed that. Great post and wonderful visuals. I’m in Jonesboro, Arkansas currently (my home) and finishing up a second home in Puerto Cayo to be finished by Thanksgiving. Where are you living?
i live in the country near jama, which is one hour up the coast from bahia de caraquez. i’ve lived here for four years, and life here reminds me of my childhood years in mississippi.. except we don’t have ice storms or tornadoes or clouds of mosquitoes! z
You go away for a couple of days and it takes a week to catch up – but thank goodness I did, because your post was gripping
thank you. i understand totally about trying to catch up. i’ve been sick for a month and i have just returned from a short trip. a renovation project starts today, and i feel as if i may never catch up on wordpress! z
And isn’t it grand we don’t have to – the beauty of blogging as a pastime
So true, and I’m very lucky that most every day is open to whatever whim that nudges me along! I think one has to have had a life that owned them before cherishing one that is more unstructured!
z
Perhaps – or a sense of choices not being for oneself, like mothers, for instance … I know I just lurve having days of unstructured time ahead of me – and even then there’s not enough hours in the day
Lovely post and words of inspiration!
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What a great post! Thanks for the reminder that the world and our life is what we make of it.
Thank you, amiga. I hope that you’re feeling 100% soon!
Z
Thanks. Better today, just a lingering headache.
What a touching and beautifully written piece.
And what a guy!
Thank you, and he truly does inspire me every day. If I have the slightest stumbling block, I know that I have hands AND feet to help break my fall. Yes, he is quite a guy. Thanks for reading his story! Z
Powerful, touching story. Don (and now Dana) are amazing. The entire family has gone through so many trials and built beautiful live. So inspiring and hopeful.
Thank you! Your beautiful comment will put large smiles on Don and Dana’s faces! I will pass it on to them now! z
Everyone else here has spoken for me. What an inspiration Don is.
Thank you, and he is one of the sweetest people on the planet! I will pass along the fan mail to him!
Z
I would like to clone him…or at least his attitude toward life.
A perfect post. Thank you for being you, for caring, for making a difference and sharing those things that inspire you. And Don, he is an inspiration for all of us. Penny xx
thanks, penny! it’s a pleasure to know you as well! i’ll be sure that don receives your kind words!
lisa/z
Please give him a great big huge hug that I am sending virtually but is meant in the real time world!!!!!
That is the most moving and inspirational story I have ever read! And so beautifully told. Thank you so much Lisa, for sharing Don’s remarkable story with us and for reminding us to ‘get out of that bed’. You are not less of an inspiration yourself.
Thank you for your kind words, my beautiful friend! I will be sure that Don reads your reply.
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What an inspiration! I am so thankful that you linked this post to your current one, or I may have missed it. I was a special education teacher for many years and worked with elementary to high school students with a variety of challenging conditions. I truly believe that attitude is our only disability. You captured the essence of Don’s can do attitude perfectly. He is a remarkable man. You must be so proud of him! Thanks Z for a very touching post.
How great that we connect once again on a different topic! Let’s see… we have Ometepe, Art, Dengue, Nancy… it’s best if you skip the vampire bat experiences!
It will be so great to meet you in person!
Z
Wow!!! What a story and so many comments. I am reminded of a high school classmate of ours who has a son with MS. Our friend Jim told us, “when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade”. His son goes hunting and fishing with him and even though this disease creeps onward toward the worst outcome Jim is ever hopeful and energetic. Great post, Lisa.
Thanks, Amiga, for sharing Jim’s story. People like Jim and Don make us realize how lucky we are to have our health.
Thanks for your comment. It’s always great to hear from you!
Lisa
I was on the edge of my seat reading this wonderful and inspirational story. Don is a man among men. Deep respect for his positive attitude and perseverance. He obviously has a ‘joie de vivre’ that is rare to see even amongst able bodied folk. I am in awe.
it is so great when someone comments from their heart, and your comment will surely give don comfort. he often shrugs and says he doesn’t know why i think he’s special. of course, that’s why we love him so much!
thank you so much, and i will be sure that he sees your comment!
z
Now I have tears in my eyes again.
tears from a sweet and tender heart.
z
What an amazing and inspirational story. As I said in my comment, “I am in awe.”
thank you so much. sometimes we are not aware of how our lives touch others, and don surely touches many by his example. thank you for helping point that out to him! z
I wake up most every day with the attitude that this day will be glorious and try to make it so. Most days I am very happy but I don’t have the physical adversity to deal with that your nephew has. Having said that, it doesn’t appear he ever lets that get in his way. What an inspiration to every one he touches! Thank you so much for sharing this amazing story. I am touched beyond words.
Thank you luAnn! I will be sure that he sees your comment. By the way, he had plans to buy a new boat this week! What a great guy! Z
Hope all his dreams come true.
So glad you linked to this post so we who missed it could read it and say our hello’s to Don.
How we chose to live our life depends on our interpretation of what we see when we get up each day.
Don could so easily be of the mind-set that thinks his cup is always half empty, that the sun only shines on the house next door, that the world owes him big time because of the accident. From what you’ve said he just dusted himself off (I know it must’ve been after much physical therapy) and carried on as if nothing happened.
you are so right! he is a shining light for all who know him.
thank you, rosie, for your beautiful comment. i will be sure that he sees it!
lisa/z
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What an inspirational story!
thank you! he is an amazing guy! z
Wow. What a story. Don’s story is so inspiring and your pride and admiration are genuinely felt through your writing
i suspected that you’d enjoy it. as i have said, he inspires me every day of my life.
i am hopeful that you’ll be able to regenerate those nerves. don’t ever give up!
z
I will NEVER give up.
i love your spirit! like don, you will touch many lives.
I have always believed in positive thinking, but right now I feel as if my life, and especially my husband’s, literally depends on it. Thanks for the inspiration!
Hey Julia
Thanks for your comment, which tells me that you’re going through a difficult time. I’m on my way to your site now!
Thank you so much,
Lisa/z
have you seen this dear lady’s blog:
cancerkillingrecipe.wordpress.com/
she’s amazing!
z
Yes, I discovered her site awhile back, and clicked “follow” right away! Thanks for the link!
i suspected that you knew her through wordpress; she is a brave and amazing woman.
A beautiful story of life, love, and determination. Truly an inspiration your nephew,his wife and their aunt, Lees.
thank you! he inspires me every day of my life. z